I Prescribe: Pinocchio

For: Juvenile Delinquency

Prescriber’s Notes: Need to teach a preschooler a thing or two about lying, obeying parents, the evils of boorish behavior, not talking to strangers, and being kind to crickets? Pinocchio is the perfect tool to keep small children in line. After watching this classic, they’ll rethink cheating at Candyland. Rhinoplasty ain’t cheap, and there’s nothing wrong with letting them know that oodles of lies now will mean spending their college fund at the plastic surgeon later.

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