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I Prescribe: Condiment Gun
For: Self Sabotage, Passive Aggressive Tendencies, Weenie Obsession
Prescriber’s Notes: If you’re going to shoot yourself in the foot, best to shoot with the ketchup gun. Go off your diet, go hog wild, and take out your aggression on your dinner. Guns and weenies. Does it get any more phallic than that? Stick em up!




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