I prescribe: Ensemble Frame

For: Linear Living, Nostalgia, Orderliness

Prescriber’s Notes: Some need things in perfect order and line: if something is off line, madness ensues. Now you can get the perfect line in your picture wall– no need to spend hours realigning every time a breath of fresh air breezes by. Include your own pictures for the nostalgic, or fill the frames with graphic, linear images.

I Prescribe: Scotch Transparent Duct Tape

For: Anxiety, Self Neglect

Prescriber’s Notes: When was the last time you had time for yourself? I mean, really for yourself. No kids, no spouse. It’s no wonder. What with the world falling apart all around you. You wish you had the time and energy to put it all back together. But regular duct tape is so unsightly. Not so with this stuff. Suddenly you’re McGuyver with a manicure.

I Prescribe: Freakeys

For: Roommate Issues, Territorialism

Prescriber’s Notes: Much more effective than scent marking all your stuff. Like your last roommate did.

I Prescribe: Feed 100 Bag from Whole Foods

For: Post Holiday Over-Indulgence Guilt, Gluttony

Prescriber’s Notes: You’ve put your holiday decorations back in storage, the extended family is gone, the kids are back in school and you’re feeling a little guilty. All the presents the kids got, the new gadget you bought and all the food you’ve consumed… Children are starving in Africa!  The Feed 100 Bag relieves the guilt. You buy. 100 kids eat.  It’s also  a great bag for running around with!

I Prescribe: Henri Bendel Gardenia Candle

For: Escapist Winter Fantasies

Prescriber’s Notes: Coconut Lime would be too obvious, wouldn’t it?  Too artificial. Slip beneath cool sheets, the lush summer scent of Gardenia in the air, and replay your favorite Great Gatsby inspired fantasy. Chasing fireflies in the Hamptons, counting shooting stars in the Outer Banks. We’re so there.

I prescribe: Chromalux Full Spectrum lightbulbs

For: The Blues, and all the other colors too

Prescriber’s Notes: The days may be getting longer but not fast enough! Best used by date precedes the vernal equinox.

I Prescribe: The Breville Ikon Panini Press

For: Abandonment Issues, Friendship Break Ups

Prescriber’s Notes: This Panini Press has the power. The power to make a perfect panini with a perfectly crisped crust. A perfectly crisped sandwich is known to make you feel cared for. Could be the carbs, but it could also be the panini press. Thus people with sandwich crispers feel loved, and are loved. *Also useful for when you feel the sudden urge to squish and burn something – just a little. (Who needed to be friends with that #$%@! anyways? )

I Prescibe: Seventh Generation Blue Eucalyptus and Lavender Laundry Detergent

For: Super-Mom Super-Guilt

Prescriber’s Notes: Too many balls in the air? Feeling like you don’t have time to do it all and do it well? Just get the laundry done with this detergent. The smell destresses and the fact that it is eco friendly will make you feel better about putting the kids to bed early so you can watch YOUR shows.