I Prescribe: Caramel Pretzel Klondike Bars

For: PMS, Emotional Injury, Any occasion that indicates the rapid administration of emergency chocolate

Prescribers Notes: Sweet, salty, creamy, chocolatey, crunchy, cool, refreshing.  Ahhhhhhhhhh.  It’s a caramel pretzel heavenly creation.  When you’re PMS-ing, these bars are the cure.

I Prescribe: Cuisinart Ice Cream Maker

For: PMS, Bad Hair Days, Breaks Ups, Break Downs, Pinkberry addiction

Prescriber’s Notes: DIY Ice Cream sans stirring. It only takes about 20 minutes so you get (almost) instant gratification. Which is a good thing. Because you need that ice cream NOW. Comes with an extra freezer bowl too, in case you decide you wanted a different flavor. Or more. More is ok too.

* awesome froyo recipe here at This Week For Dinner (thank me later!)

I Prescribe: Whimsy Ring

For: Indecisiveness, Nothing to wear, PMS

Prescriber’s Notes: Finally a ring to match your every mood that doesn’t come from a gumball machine or turn your finger green. It does turn everyone green with envy though. Side effects include an obsession with murano glass beads.

I prescribe: House of Tsang Mongolian Fire Oil

For: Culinary doldrums, “That-time-of-the-month” munch-fest

Prescriber’s Notes: A blend of sesame oil, chili, and garlic, this lighter oil for seasoning compliments any Asian dish and then a bunch of non-Asian ones too – try it on eggs. Or better yet, pop a giant bowl full of popcorn and mix this with butter and parmesan cheese. You will have died and gone to heaven!

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I Prescribe: Red Velvet Revolution Cupcake in a Jar

For: PMS, Guilt, Cupcake Cravings, Reaching out to old friends.

Prescriber’s Notes: Don’t you hate that distance separates us from some of our friends? Well now you can send you BFF that cupcake to show em that you care. When you receive one of these in your mailbox, you’ll forget the crappy day that you had.

I Prescribe: Marital Bliss Bars from Bloomsbury Chocolate

For: Score settling, Possessiveness, Random acts of Kindness that dangerously coincide with random moods of PMS

Prescriber’s Notes: All is fair in love and Chocolate. Let’s be honest with ourselves. We did not really buy this bar to share with our spouses did we? Unless we are the dude in the doghouse. In which case you gotta go out, buy this bar and then announce that you don’t even deserve your skewed 50%. It’s all for her. That’s fanning the flames of true marital bliss. 

I Prescribe: Chanel Rouge Allure Lipstick

For: PMS, Bad Hair Days, Courage

Prescriber’s Notes: Every woman should have a tube of Chanel lipstick in her handbag. Even if it’s a cheap handbag. Put your hair in a ponytail, apply lipstick, lift chin and march right in there like you know you belong. There is no lipstick like Chanel lipstick. When it matters, it is what you wear.