I Prescribe: TwoDaLoo

For: BFF’s, Peeps with separation anxiety, Freaks

Prescriber’s Notes: You’re up each other’s behinds 23/7. Why not make it 24/7? All those annoying potty breaks probably keep you apart for a good hour every day in total. Get that quality time back.

I Prescribe: Tali Gillette Mama Necklace

For: Separation Anxiety, Sleep Deprivation

Prescriber’s Notes: The baby weaned himself. The kindergartener got on the bus without crying. The High School Freshman asked you to drop her off at the corner, cause she doesn’t think she looks cool when you hover. You went to labor and delivery and all you got was the (anything but lousy) necklace. And it still makes you all verklempt.